Hot Singles In Conversation: Should You Text Your Ex Happy Birthday?

reply guy and handsome hitchhiker discuss the age old question

hey hotties!

you might remember Hot Singles In Conversation, when Reply Guy and Handsome Hitchhiker discussed booty calls. this week at hot singles HQ*, a new topic has sparked disagreement: is it appropriate or morally Good to send a happy birthday text to your ex? in honor of my recent birthday, i’ve brought the boys back to tackle this thorny topic.

their opinions are only the beginning of the discussion. i’ve opened up the comment section for the rest of us to chime in. let us know what you think:

stay hot 🥵

-randa

*hot singles HQ is an amorphous set of group texts and social settings within the greater hot singles community

---

Should you text your ex Happy Birthday?

Harry (aka Reply Guy):

Randa this is a great question. I want to first say that this question is no trivial matter. Your ex’s birthday is an extremely important day. It feels biblical to me. Every year you get to stare at your phone, and sort of game theory out what it would feel like to be back dating your ex. This happens to everyone, and maybe a working theory I have is that the shorter you spend dwelling on that idea, the more over them you are. 

I think the best way to figure out what you should do is to grab a white board and game theory it out. Here is a template:

One final caveat: If you dated for less than 3 months, i want to be crystal clear, you need to forget what day they were born. This is better for everyone involved. Just follow them on IG for the rest of your life and never text them again. 

David (aka Handsome Hitchhiker):

Thanks for bringing this up, Randa. I agree with Harry – it’s a good question. That’s probably all I agree with though, and I’ll keep my response brief. I think it’s a question we all think about WAY too much. 

I do really appreciate his flow chart approach, so I’ll build off of that. I think he started from the wrong first question. The first question at the top of the chart needs to be: did you end it?

---

has this discussion moved you? do you have a different approach? join the conversation:

---

hotsingles.nyc FAQ • get featured • submit a missed connection • get advice from Help me, Randa! • follow hot singles on twitter • follow hot singles on instagram • follow your dreams