thx to everybody who came out last night! check out the instagram story for pics and reviews from the party guests. here’s a sneak peek:
for those who weren’t there last night, let’s get back to bizniz. this week’s hot single is physically big and strong. and he’s got a strong personality too–this sexy storyteller doesn’t shy away from confrontation. but while he’s a fighter, he’s also a lover. could you be the genre-defying woman he’s looking for?
stay hot 🥵
p.s. have you taken the first birthday survey yet? fill it out for a chance to win some limited edition merch (!!) and to influence hot singles in the year to come :)
what are you most proud of?
A few years ago after shutting down my startup and suffering from severe burnout, I picked up a pretty serious writing habit. I'm proud of some of the writing I've done, but more so the fact that I committed myself to a practice that I actually cared about.
It started with an essay about the failure of my startup. A lot of people read it and I became the most famous failure in New York for about 15 minutes. Next I told the story of a recent breakup through the smells and sounds of a Saturday morning bacon cooking fiasco – that one got published, and my writing has only gotten weirder from there. I’m currently working on a story about a struggling novelist who is struck by inspiration and becomes a prolific writer of erotic fiction after Airbnb tenants have sex on his desk. A metaphysical fable, if you will.
if you were an animal what would you be and why?
I have a recurring dream in which I’m hiding out at the bottom of a dark swimming pool, hearing a commotion above the surface and refusing to come up. There are clicks and whistles and the sounds of a distant bullhorn. The third or fourth time I had this dream I realized that I was an orca at SeaWorld, which makes sense, because I’ve always identified with Tilikum more than any of those dumb trainers that got in the pool with him. I’m very large and pretty and social and I like to play and roam free, but if I’m forced to act like somebody I’m not for long enough I may lash out and possibly kill my trainer.
😈 what’s your toxic trait?
I have a hard time biting my tongue if I hear something that I find offensive or strongly disagree with – my party trick, for example, is alienating all of the moderate liberals in the room (…from the Left, mind you). I’d like to think that this just means I’m passionate, but apparently, I am told, there are some battles that you just can’t win. I don’t know, I just don’t like letting people get away with saying shitty things!
🥵 what makes you hot?
Not everyone will find this hot, but I don't shy away from talking about ugly or uncomfortable things (might run towards them if I'm honest). I like to tear things apart with my brain and ideally have a conversation partner while doing so. I can be...intense? Strong eye contact. But I also have very calming vibes when the time calls for it, give sound advice, make a lot of jokes, and deeply love my dog and my mom, which people tend to think is cute. And I'm big and strong if that's your thing.
🔎 who are you looking for?
I’m looking for a woman who will stay up all night talking with me. A woman who is passionate about something (unless her passion is NFTs, please no NFTs).
Creative, curious, kind, progressive. Likes to get up and do/make things, sometimes weird things. Someone who goes against the grain, has been called both ‘irreverent’ and ‘surprising’ before.
Has found some stability in life but still looks for adventures, and wants to share those with a killer whale and his dog, Dorothy.
🙋🏻 if you’re interested in this week’s hot single, respond to this email or send a message to email@example.com with a photo and a little bit about yourself :)