23NB Professional Party Girl Seeks Bouncer To Guard Their Heart

hey hotties!

we’re doing two hot singles a week all november. you might remember today’s hot single from their party report for NYMag. their work might have you think they’re all gossip and jokes at the expense of others, but they’ve got a tender romantic side too. are you the upstate-loving tatted bi boy for this professional party girl? seems a little specific, but i think brooklyn will deliver :)

stay hot 🥵

-randa

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what’s one thing you can’t live without? 

Stevie Nicks. Lol. I take a lot of pride in the fact that there are dozens and dozens of boys out there who will never be able to hear a Stevie Nicks or Fleetwood Mac song ever again without thinking of me. She’s the looping playlist in my Mind Palace. I’ve been obsessed since I was in the 5th grade, and have a post break-up Bella Donna tattoo to prove it. No one’s ever written about heartbreak and love and romantic feminine angst better than Stevie. She’s super sensitive in a way that I think I might be too, for better or worse (I’m a stereotypical pisces, even though I claim to not be into those things). If I could do absolutely anything in life, it would be writing her authorized biography. I watch this “Rhiannon” video where she cries once a week.

what’s your ideal date? 

There’s no date idea I find sexier than getting dressed up and meeting for cocktails at a fancy hotel bar, pretending like we’re strangers and attempting to pick each other up (you’ll do just fine, darling). It satisfies all of my weird, unhealthy wealth fantasies. This is also a cliché but since I moved to New York I’ve been searching for a boy to take me on a romantic rendezvous upstate. Drive me to a cabin in the woods, and let’s spend the weekend hiking during the day, drinking too much in the evening, and spending late mornings in bed, alternatively flipping through magazines and getting it on. 

😈 what’s your toxic trait?

I asked my best friend who said, a little too quickly, “Your mercurial nature, especially after a drink or two.” What he’s trying to say, diplomatically, is I can be a bit of a hothead, and have a bad habit of picking verbal fights with strangers. But I’ve been working on it. Watching Housewives satisfies my need for drama and gossip. Oh, and smoking. I’m “working” on that too.

🥵 what makes you hot?

Not dissimilar to the above, I’m a fabulous gossip, and one of those people who weird things are always happening to, which is probably why I’m a party columnist (and a Carrie). I promise by the end of an evening together I’ll tell you a really great story. I also might write about you, but everyone secretly likes attention.

🔎 who are you looking for?

At heart, I’m just a middle-aged woman looking for a slightly older, more conventionally masculine husband, hence my penchant for dark-haired tatted bi boys in Brooklyn. If I can’t stay still at a party, you’re always in one place, holding court, and we’re watching each other from across the room. I hope you’re kind of nerdy, but chic, in an unpretentious way.

🙋🏻 if you’re interested in this week’s hot single, respond to this email or send a message to hi@hotsingles.nyc with a photo and a little bit about yourself :)

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