30M Good Apologizer Seeking Healthy Relationship With Occasional Conflict

hey hotties! the modern day philosopher alain de botton suggests that we ask each other, “how are you crazy?” early on in the dating process. with that in mind, we’ve replaced the stats and favs section with the hot singles version of his question ;)

and there’s no better person to take on the challenge than this week’s hot single. our Good Apologizer says he can be impulsive and adventurous to a fault, but he keeps himself in check with daily meditation, journaling, and exercise. a genuinely fun guy with his shit together? that’s right.

- randa


what do your days look like? how do you balance work and personal life? 

I start most mornings by meditating, working out, and writing in my journal—but this makes me sound way more disciplined than I actually am. Although I do enjoy a good routine, I’ll gladly ditch work and buy a last-minute plane ticket to California if the impulse strikes (at least, once I get my Covid vaccine).

By day I run an online writing program that’s kind of like a startup accelerator for bloggers and newsletter authors, so I straddle the writing and tech worlds. I’ve never been a big fan of the term “work-life balance”; I like “work-life Jenga” much better. That means sometimes staying up late to finish a big project, and sometimes faking sick and ditching work to visit an obscure museum.

how would your friends describe you?

I asked some of my friends about this and here’s what they said:

  • “Ability to dish out and receive digs, and to find humor in any situation”

  • “Knows how to apologize, which is arguably the most important thing in a relationship”

  • “Inspiring/intimidating level of knowledge”

  • “Thoughtful and reflective in an admirable way as opposed to annoyingly self actualized”

  • “Magnet for cool/interesting people, which I can then freeride on”

  • “Bad with money (in a way that’s fun for the recipients of his largesse)”

😈 what’s your toxic trait?

Every weakness is just the flip side of a corresponding strength—I’m adventurous and impulsive, but often to a fault. In the immortal words of Saint Augustine (who I’m citing despite being Jewish), “God, grant me chastity and continence, but not yet.”

🥵 what makes you hot?

I strike the perfect balance between being a type-A high-achiever who has my shit together and doesn’t believe in crystals and a hippie freak who runs an adult summer camp and knows that existence is a cosmic joke. It’s the best of both worlds! Plus, I once bought and restored an abandoned mansion in Detroit with some friends. Manual labor is hot, right?

🔎 who are you looking for?

A woman who’s open to something serious but doesn’t take any of this too seriously.


🙋🏻‍♀️ if you’re interested in this week’s hot single, respond to this email and tell him a little bit about yourself

how does this work?

  1. you receive a weekly personal ad for a hot single

  2. if you’re interested, you respond to the ad. (have a friend who might be interested? forward it to them!)

  3. a member of our team will share your message with the hot single, and they’ll take it from there

who is hot singles for?

  • we’ve got a variety of genders and sexualities on our list. most people are in their 20s and 30s. all are welcome. tell your friends 👯

can i reach out to more than one hot single?

  • yes. you’re encouraged to respond to as many ads as you’d like.

how do i get featured?

  • respond to this email to join the waitlist :)


You can always see the archive at hotsingles.nyc and reach out to hi@hotsingles.nyc if you’re interested in anybody from previous weeks 🧡